Have a...

Assalamualaikum,

Post 27: Have a friend who will remind you of what you have left behind
Honestly, I do not have the slightest idea of what to name this post (and decided to go gintama-style). I went to look at my previous post titles.
They don't make sense do they?
Nope they don't.
Just how all your posts are
I don't necessarily hate the posts titles cause just like today's post, it was a "done-at-the-moment" kind of thing.
I never plan my posts /hides. I always excitedly think about what to write though and the results is this site you even bother coming across to by chance.

Because of that though is one of the reasons why I really really admire people who do plan before they write and a very close and great example would be a dear friend of mine, Iween .
 Check out her blog "Wendystrucked " (click to be directed to her site ) to see what I mean (her writing is just so enjoyable to read and I hope you enjoy every posts of hers cause I did).

Wait, I made a mistake. The initial content that I thought up is always way different than the last product (in the end your enthusiasm meant nothing huh?).

This blogging of mine had been going on for approximately 8 years.
Imagine that!
8 years and only 27 posts as of today.
It can only mean one thing.
I changed this blog way too many times.
From the appearances, name of site and its overall content.
again, it can only mean some things:
1) Most of my posts are just stupid
2) I change my mind quite a lot of times and regretted every single terminated posts.
3) Which means the posts are mostly cringe-y

Well anyways...
As much as I'd like to leave my title totally vague and unrelated , I would like to take this chance to brag that I have that type of friend. In fact more than one. One that's constantly reminding me of my blogs, my other sites, things I was suppose to do, embarrassing memories I wish not to remember.
And really I am pretty grateful for them being by my side and big apologies because unfortunately for you I am such a lazy person.
Again though, I really appreciate that unlike me, you had remembered the things that I was supposed to tend to. Thank you.

Moving on,
as I mentioned in the last long and windy post, I would be putting up my drawing trashes from 2016 (and some from this year) in this post .
They may not be as pretty as you expect them to be (does anyone even have any expectations for it? /laughs) but these are drawn with smiles on my face (and sometimes frown/depending on what I was drawing) and lots and lots of experimentation that I enjoyed a whole lot!

Here's to the one friend who's so loyal to my art site despite it being in a hiatus state:

Title: One day I'll tell you why we have never met /inspired by my first love yeah lol

 Listening to Aoi Shiori/ Blue Bookmark (Galileo Galilei) at 1 am resulted in this long-anticipated AnoHana fanart below:

My second try at the "Female Warrior" theme. I like how it turned out.

"Is the pianist a bear?" Based on an anime ost. Also my sister's most frequent question/just kidding.

My attempt on the theme : Maps.

"The Shape of my heart" / I overdid the paper/poor paper

My first watercolor piece lol

                                     

Gintama fan arts incoming (mostly of my favorite pairings namely Okita Sougo and Kagura):

One of my most favorite drawing of all featuring Gintoki and child! Kagura from Gintama.

Because  dad!Gintoki is just a bliss.

Watercoloring this was so much fun.

A page of my Gintama's fan comic(s). I totally enjoyed this.

A draft version of a doodle comic I plan to post InsyaAllah soon

 And below are mostly of my most recent digital arts in 2016 ( which to be honest weren't that much cause my hand just won't cooperate well with my tablet /laughs/ I still need to get used to it):

The only (digital) collab with my sister that was completed.

A birthday gift for a friend. Kageyama Tobio and Hinata Shoyo!/ The closest thing I can draw to a chibi lol.

The most very very recent digital drawing. Gintama again. Its actually not complete. I only managed to fill in the base color.

I worked hard on this one. Kyouka Izumi from Bungou Stray Dogs Series.

My original characters: Moroshita Yuri and Mitsuru Touya

Aihara Enju from Black Bullet!

Latest watercolor. Was dying to experiment again.

Whew!
That is alot!
Thank you so much for following up to this point hahaha!
One of the drawings is a sneak peek of what my next post. Basically a doodle comic I came up with few days ago.
It's already completed so no worries. All there is left to do is to post em!

Listening to: Can't Stop The Feeling -Justin Timberlake


Well then,
AniYuuki

Been Gone

Assalamualaikum (May peace be upon you)

Post 26: I have been gone too long
Steps a little further from my laptop, stroking my chin for a dramatic effect, read the title/ Yeap perfect! (Author's approval is dripping with sarcasm).

You might be wondering, why did she suddenly pop out and from where.
Hey, I am curious too so let's look back at the few minutes prior to me typing away on the keyboard.

It all started with-
I was just strolling around Youtube listening to disney's Moana soundtracks -cause I am in love with Moana-when I finally remembered I have been wanting to visit this stranded blog of mine since gosh I-dont-know when(since I seem to forget everytime I turn my laptop on). Perhaps the nostalgia and overwhelming feelings Moana gave me reminded me of this wish of mine.
And so since I was worried I might forget about it again (and maybe forget about this blog altogether) I obliged.
I read the last few posts and I have to laugh.
Purely because I can almost feel that exact moment when I wrote that last post.
Relieved of exam mostly and anticipating my holiday plans and of course, work.
...Which the first part never work- that includes me blogging too btw.
So here I am randomly deciding to post a spontaneous post. I actually have alot in mind right now.
Most of them involving the things that I went through the last half of 2016 (oh yeahh, happy new year to you).
However since those are very likely gonna end up windy, long, dull and uninteresting I am challenging myself to summarize my 2016 (the last six months that is)!
Here I go:

Lets start with answering the question "so how did I do in the exam I mentioned in the last post?"

Well, if you wanna know, I received my results at the office where I was assigned for the holiday. I put an indifferent face the whole time that day (while everybody anxiously talked about theirs) but disappointment hold my heart and mocking laughs echoed in my head.
It wasn't terrible really but gosh what is wrong with my standards? (which I realised wasn't only mine) but hey, I knew now that I got what I deserved. (Ha! that's what you get for being okay coming up with stories instead of studying).

Gosh this is going to be long it seems.

Skipping to the month when my sister came home.
I was so happy. Very happy indeed.
We made use of the time we had and I tried hard to not bring "work" when I returned home for the weekend (Hey, you sound like a man who tried to assure his wife that his worklife is doing great lol) but "trying" is probably not the word /laughs. I DID NOT want to. There you go.
I'd rather not touch this topic though lol cause it is very personal for me. It was another world I have to admit.
Alhamdulillah I survived though but not without another rounds of emotional turmoils and crying to sleep unfortunately and being in an asthmatic state for a week non-stop (away from home with people who had never seen me in that state) didn't help . Boy was that terrible. It was the worst asthma experience I ever had and I had to lie I was fine which btw is a poor lie considering my ragged breath was such a big giveaway but nobody pressed on the matter thankfully (except for my families whom when they found out, were very angry) cause the last thing I needed was people worrying about me (which only worsens it ).

But truly, I thank Allah for the strengths to make it through.

Moving back to where I have been with my sister. We had lots of fun. Drew together, sang together, prayed together, whipping dark matter work in the kitchen and just having her beside me was all that I needed.

 Going back to school in August for the third semester came shortly after.
To be honest it was a rather short one, at least that's what I felt.
Everyday it felt as if I was waiting for it to start /laughs/ and after the stress of works and assignments and clubs (apparently I was appointed being a president of the art club and guess what? I was so disappointed / you dont get to sleep on the couch every session / Kono Bijutsubu ni wa mondai ga aru aka This art club has a problem! anime-manga reference *laughs*) and reaching the exam period I was slapped to reality: the year is ending.

And to be real honest again, I have no idea if I progressed or not this semester.
If I was busy remaking story ideas in the second semester, I was worse in the last semester.
And I meant it.
It was a real nightmare gosh.
I pushed everything to the deadlines and pushed myself to my limits.
I remembered I had only 20 minutes sleep that particular night day before waking up for school cause I spent the night doing this assignment which isnt even near easy-cause-its-in-the-notes-and-it-was-taught (cause it wasnt taught) which is probably why I left it as the last one to do in the first place. I know. I earned that disaster.
 I still couldn't believe I managed to learn some foreign formulas (and determining the right one to use) and reading graphs by myself that night and redo the whole thing because I was so careless).
Horrible.
Thank Allah for some of my friends who helped me to get the gist of it.
Thank Allah it was only a less than two hour (heck, I think it wasn't even an hour) class before I slept the whole ride back home.

I started counting the exact time I have to sleep this time around but its funny since I am not the type to immediately drift to sleep once my body hits the bed. I need at least an hour for everything (note; my mind) to settle

It was a rather chaotic semester and no matter how much I want to bring myself to not care, I couldn't / am not that irresponsible.
Let's not start on the exam period.
I have to honor it the worst revision period I ever had.

Before that...
As I mentioned , I was crowned (uh-huh grand applause) the art club president. It was not something I wish to happen even though I knew it was coming.
Immediately I was exposed to a part of the school that I don't know of and wish to remain ignorant on. My first mindset was "everyone's expecting me to know everything even if I literally only went to the club once or twice" and I wouldnt say I was wrong. Some did and it was hard cause I dont have anyone to turn to and I didnt want to trouble anyone.

I was struggling.

I was so focused on becoming a good president (perhaps being one in my sixth form triggers the alarm bells in my head) that I didnt realise my committee -whom were all first years albeit older- had no more experience than I do (I guess I immediately thought they would be more experienced or at the least could handle it face-on cause they are nothing like me. Nope. Not shy, Not withdrawn and whose hands didnt shake when she talks and I again decided to shoulder everything to myself).
After a while, I finally came to an understanding that my committee needs my help as much as I need theirs.
I finally see that they were also pushed into the positions without any warning (*laughs in a straight tone* in fact I was warned beforehand btw. I saw all the signs coming) and were as clueless as me on how to run a club professionally.

In the end, I came to accept it and even enjoyed every moment I spent with my committee and club members.
They are amazing people, truly and I have never even imagined I would be making friends with people outside my course.
Every session end with an exhausted me but with a smile etched on my face.
I swear there wasn't any session that are silent despite me fearing I would be Boring. These people are so close-knitted with one another that I unexpectedly grew comfortable to (and considering how we seemingly always ended up having a non-small talks, it was refreshing to be able to engaged with the conversations).
May Allah bless them .
I swear to you writing those made me smile.


And no, I did not forget about my rants.
Wait, this whole post IS a rant.

Carrying the club matters on my shoulder, I worried for projects and my time for studying.
However at the same time,  I was excited on planning for a very own art project.
It was a first and it just made me so enthusiastic.
Each day an idea would be added to the long lists of artworks ideas.
I never got tired of just looking at them, happy to just begin.
I went shopping right away and I swear it's the first time in my whole life I ever own so many art supplies and seriously I couldnt have done it without a friend of mine whom is also an art-enthusiast and know more than I do but didnt mind sharing them with me with great excitement. Apparently she also has the ability to bring a side of me that I have never shown to anyone. I was surprised myself when I realised this.
 
At the same time as well, I was infatuated with gintama more than ever especially since I have started watching it at that point.
Fanarts and fanfictions, I grabbed all there is that the fandom can offer. It's horrifying and blissful at the same time cause it's gintama , an anime that can make me (and most other fans) cry and laugh in an episode.
This anime and its manga deserve a whole separate post and maybe I would work on it, InsyaAllah.

With being hooked up with art and owning new art supplies (with the addition to being exposed to different art medium and styles credits to my friends and club), I was in art high the entire semester.
The best thing was I took the courage and decided to try new stuffs (watercolors, complex drawings etc) and enjoyed it.

-Which just lead to why I had a trouble focusing on my studies.
My mind was full with art ideas and my hand always had the urge to draw on every empty space on my notes.
Beside being in my art high I was simply anxious to study.
It was so hard and I need to reread the same line of a text over and over again but it just slipped out as easily as it entered.
It didnt help that I was rewriting what I have revised and realising I do not understand them.
Suddenly my whole course seems so foreign and it just fueled the fear .
It would paralysed me in my seat, the blood loud in my ear and my brain would stop for the rest of the day, only functioning when I ponder why I was acting like that and drowned into another fits of self pity.
In the end I stick to being a night owl with my concentration improving by night time and I spent the remaining hours before sleeping, (which was around 3 am at the least) summarising my notes and cramping them into my head before attempting whatever past year papers I could.
Again, I ended up with a lack of sleep.

Thinking back, I probably shed more tears than I ever did revise.

On one of the days I didnt have exam, I decided I was tired of the whole cycle.
The art high was easy to control by giving them time to flow whenever I need a break but the anxiety was harder.
 The first thing I did to help myself was to stop staring at my feet (which is a habit I fell into whenever I think about my self worth I realised).
I stop bringing myself down and excusing myself with it cause initially it was indeed my own fault for falling into a terrible studying pattern.
I stop self-pitying.
It wasnt easy *laughs*, really it wasn't.
Soon, I managed to dawn it to myself that I wasn't special in anyway.
I might have been through some bad things which undoubtedly others had as well and there is no particular reason why I should be excused.
To be excused from the hardship of the world, from decisions and my responsibility to change whatever it is I dislike.
I am responsible of my life after all and I can't just announce to the world that I am running away for abit and that they should just accept it cause I deserve it.
I hold on to these mindset and Alhamdulillah until the end of the exam (which I greatly dread) I managed to hold on and try my best to study.

After the exam, I was completely immersed in my art-high which surprisingly did not extinguished like it usually did. I explored every inch of my brain and the result? I drew almost everyday, almost filling up a quite new notebook of mine.
I also answered to my love for gintama with a few spontaneous (Yes, I literally came up with a comic idea at 1 am in the morning) more-than-5-pages decent-looking comics which is something I haven't done in years (personally I place them close to my heart cause I enjoyed doing them and they surprises me with great paneling I didn't know I could do).

All in all I was a happy being drawing during the holiday.
As for my other holiday plans which only consist of watching gintama, I managed to complete two seasons/ I am taking it slow really and I have no idea why.
My examination's result were out halfway into the holiday. To be honest, I wasnt expecting anything great . In actuality I even refused going out of my bedroom that day until I got my results via my friends.
When I did though, I have to look at it repeatedly to make sure I got the right result.

Alhamdulillah.
I wanted to cry but I want to question my results first.
How?
I have no idea.
It was so much better than I thought. In fact, my result was better than the rest of my semesters.
Really, how? when I was obviously struggling getting through the exam weeks.
Only Allah knows.

All in all, it was another hectic year with so much going on, loss and gains.
Alhamdulillah I have made it through and hopefully did grew in some aspects.

In the end, it was such a long and boring posts.
But since the beginning of it I have decided I might as well rant selfishly and let it be the way it is.
If anybody's gonna read it by any chance, they will.
It might be for a few while until I post again /laughs.

I apologize for this diary-entry like post cause maybe it is? Perhaps I am hoping I would come back again like I did today and have a good laugh at how silly I have been during my youth days (really, when am I expecting to come back? lol).

InsyaAllah next time I might post some drawings that I had done for the pas few months last year that I really like (since this is probably the only best platform there is for posting them lol).



Listening to: Dark Days-Local Natives


"The countries? The skies? You can have them. I'm busy just protecting what's right in front of me"-Sakata Gintoki from Gintama.
(seriously how can I even fall in love with a lazy-bum, diabetic, sweets-addict anime character with silver perm? just kidding . Anyone watching the series will have the answer).




Well then,
AniYuuki

Post-exam post

Assalamualaikum!

Post 25: Semester break
And.. here I am, 2 days after exam had ended. Alhamdulillah / hopefully I did well.
And.. here I am with promises and words saying I'll be posting often and well, you can see how that would really end!
Well, I will try InsyaAllah.
I am not as committed as I hope I'd be.
Like, during the exam itself I wasn't completely committed to revisions but instead I managed to come up with a re-make and ideas for FIVE of my stories!
Seriously?!
Yes...
Wow, my mind can be quite mixed up sometimes doesnt it?
But really, that's how it's always been.. creative juice flow during times that I do not want it to flow (laughs).
Not that I mind though but back again, I do hope I did well in the exam.

As for finishing semester 2 (InsyaAllah if all is well),
I feel truly great. It wasn't the same feelings when I completed first semester due to many reasons.
One of the reason is me being a person I can truly claim "happy".
Moreover, though I had more than six assignments (and presentations plus tests combined), I managed to handle it properly.
I even managed to socialise more. Yes, the me who claimed not wanting any interaction actually interacted with people. Overall, it was refreshing (since they were all nice and really considerate) and it was delightful of how big the difference was compared to when I was "upset". Alhamdulillah!
Bonus point for this semester is having computing class and learning coding (though most of us complained about it frequently / of course not without any reason) which was kinda stressful yet fun.

Moving on to my holiday plan,
as usual it involves watching animes and drawing (laughs).
I have list down more than 30 animes to watch this break but I guess in reality, that's too good to be true if I can finish them all (unless I am some real all-nighters otakus which I'm kinda is and isnt).
 Included in the list are Fate series, Code:Geass (which my sister insisted I watch first haha), Law of Ueki, Yakitate Japan, Gakuen Toshi Asterisk, Magi and the list goes on. I am basically touching newer and older animes . Of course, this spring season anime would also be included. Right now I am watching Koutetsujou no Kabaneri (loving the Op and ED/ animation superb / plot kinda lacking/ we'll see bout that though), Bungou Stray Dogs (yes!! Its finally here! Its okay I guess haha/ I am enjoying it but perhaps I expected too much/ It might also because the surprise elements doesnt work on me who have read the mangas beforehand), Re:Zero Kara Hajimeru Isekai Sekaitsu ( my little brother recommended this/ the story attracts me/and of course the design) and Kiznaiver (A captivating first episode with thrilling and detailed animation captures my eyes/ Although I do not have high hopes for it, I do intend to catch up with it/ Everything's so colorful that I was reminded of Gatchaman Crowds -another series I havent finish).

As expected, this past two days I didnt start with my plans immediately (I am feeling pretty restless, tired and anxious of what I should be doing / and I hope it won't drag on haha!)
I did quite a few drawings though.
My drawings/ well I must say/ is undergoing some changes. It happened during the revision week. I was surprised myself. I do like the changes though haha.

Well then, I present them to you including those I draw in March and April:

Trying out new coloring styles so I didnt pay much attention to the lineart (;.;)  (c) Aniyuuki

Kagura Baby, I remember being in OkiKagu (Gintama OTPs) fever for days so I draw her XD (c) AniYuuki

Quick sketch of Hibiki from Hibiki's magic/her eyes are too big (c) AniYuuki

Mumei/badass female lead from Kabaneri/ Drew this just last night (c)Aniyuuki

I got my hands dirty drawing this but it was worth it.

Kinomoto Sakura in one of her pretty costumes(c)Aniyuuki

Haha you can see a little chicken and unidentified object on her right (those are drawn by my little brother (-,-') ...her eyes too big huhu and I apologise for bad photo quality! Great timing though! Its Cardcaptor's 20th anniversary recently and a new manga on the same franchise is going to be published in June!

Just finish this recently. I am satisfied with the color. I am getting closer to what I want but I lack consistency/weird body proportion though

(c)Aniyuuki

Another cardcaptor Sakur's fanar/now along with Tomoyo/You can see here how my lineart has a gentler look haha I wonder if it has something to do with my pencil lead (c)Aniyuuki

Another random stuff/I really like this drawing (c)Aniyuuki

If you realised, the characters in this drawing and the above one are quite similar/except for the guy (c)AniYuuki

Well, isnt that too many? haha
oh well it's fine I guess XD
Drawing is, I realized the only thing of this world that I know what I want. I know how I want my drawing to look like, I know what I want from it. There's of course a long story, one that I didnt even realised I went through, when I was searching for those goals and wants.
And since I know what I want, I know well I have no excuses for running away from this .
Well I am gonna do my best! :D


Oh wow, that was a long post wasnt it?
well then,
AniYuuki

Listening to: Swing-Knuckle Puck <3

Pre-Exam Post

Assalamualaikum!

Post 24: 2 weeks to Exam
 Its been a whilee ain't it?
Just what the title say, in 2 weeks time I will be sitting in the somewhat large hall of my university.
I am really trying hard to study haha but truth be told, my "art-high" tend to occur during examination or rather critical time .
Just yesterday and today I drew 5 digital drawings (*x*)..actually that's rare hahaha!

Anyway my purpose today is just to pop up because...wait, what? this is my first post in 2016? *laughs* I am seriously a busy woman then /not really.

I have a long list of anime reviews and recommendations in my head and I have to save that for later post. InsyaAllah.

All the best to everyone in all things you do!

Oh! and let's welcome Hinata (Haikyuu!!) to my collections of nendoroid  (>v<)

Hinata Shoyo / Haikyuu!! (c)AniYuuki / along with my new signature

Well then,
AniYuuki

First Semester Break

Assalamualaikum (May Peace Be Upon You) Peeps!

Post 23: Plain Me is back!
First of all.... I am staring at the words "plain" right now.It looks odd. Is that the correct spelling? haha oh well.

How are you all. Its been approximately almost 3 months since I last came here to post something.
I'm currently on holiday-which I plan on spending it on stuffs that I listed out way before the exams last month. Up to this day none seems to work out hahah!
At the least I have done all requests on my pockets . Yeah, debts paid. Alhamdulillah and Thank You!
I don't think I would be taking anymore thou (;.;)
I decided to do things that seems possible for the holiday such as drawing fanarts,  reviewing tutorials and improving my art styles plus watching animes (and draw everyday! which is a success *laughs*)

 I have also been in the kitchen more this month after a long time (like, since my sister went overseas). Note, what I meant by being in the kitchen is just gobbling on foods   cooking. On the first day, I made a random yet surprisingly delicious pasta with random ingredients in it *laughs* . I spent hours on it but satisfied!
The next day I made a brownie in a mug twice which is such a treat! yum .
I was sure there was another one..but I dont remember.
Well, anyway few days earlier my mother and brother begs me to make lava cake.
I had a hard time looking for a perfect recipe and have to do stuffs like conversion and ratio to compare each recipes . It was such a fun experience but.... it didnt turn out right. The taste was alright but the part of a lava cake that makes a lava cake a lava cake just didn't exist in my lava cake.
Yes, the center of my "lava cake" was almost cook so when you sliced the cake into half, the chocolate batter just wont come flowing/ cries/  the purpose of a lava cake!
Well, it do taste nice though ..gotta make sure not to overcook it next time...uh-huh.
My next baking event would be a yummy-looking chocolate cookies recipe my friend tried. I cant wait! 

no chocolatey center ... huhu/crappy photo

Anyway, moving on; drawing!
This year is - I hope I don't sound exaggerating- Alhamdulillah the most significant improvement in my drawing. Looking back at all my drawings from the beginning of the year (and which I probably mention, was very different from last year's) till now, there's a huge difference (at least in my eyes..) and no matter what, I see it as a good and positive thing!
I hope to compile my drawings just so you can see the difference but I dont know any software (for laptops) that could make a good collage. Hehe if any of you do, please do suggest!

And, while we're on the topic, I think I am gonna make the documentary soon! *bows* Such a delay!
I will see to it InsyaAllah after I finish a collab art I am currently doing.
 For now, enjoy a gallery dump of what I have been drawing these few days :

Rin my ol' OC (c) AniYuuki I have just draw this a few hours ago

Princess Rein and Fine of Fushigi Boshi no Futago Hime by Mayuki ANAN . I really love her detailed drawings.

Cardcaptor Tomoyo! This is seriously way overdue. It's a collab with my sis (she's drawing Sakura ) even before she left *laughs*. I thought I should just post it since it's gonna stay a WIP it seems. and trust me, only the face plus head and hair is truly my work. I traced the rest of the body which explains why it looks perfect! But I like the idea of Tomoyo as one (*x*)

Gekkan Shoujo Nozaki Kun's Sakura Chiyo and Mikoshiba Mikoto! I dont ship these two but they're my favs . Such a mess for a practice ;-; but still an okay.

Koto from Kyousougiga. The lineart was completed months ago. Finally got the motivation to color it! :D but its not complete yet. BG to come and I realized that some parts are still uncolored hahaha.

Little Mikasa (Attack on Titan) . I really enjoy this regardless being stressed out with the layers confusion and the roughness of my lines.

This was drawn in November. My two new OCs : Kana and Ryo (right) . The body's weird. (c) AniYuuki

Well then, its already late here.
Have a good and safe day!

Listening To: Trees- Twenty One Pilots (Awesome duo)